HOW TO BECOME A DESIRABLE COLUMNIST
by Allan R. Andrews
American Reporter Correspondent

WASHINGTON -- Part of my duties recently has been preparing the newspaper's op-ed pages. In the process, I think I've discovered one of the tiny little secrets of editors of such pages that could be a boon to opinion writers.

The advice I'm about to offer is no guarantee to publication, of course, and I confess that I have a hard time learning this lesson, but I think it will greatly improve a writer's chances with the editorial page editors of the nation's newspapers.

Editors of editorial pages generally seek to maintain a varied set of balances: Conservative biases are weighed against liberal biases -- and also against moderate biases that would probably dominate if some extremists were not given a voice in the public forum of editorial pages.

The balance of humor and serious concern is important, too, as is a limiting of cynicism and sarcasm. Humanity shall not live by Dave Barry alone.

If resources allow, the editor strives to balance weekly syndicated commentary with one-time, issue-oriented social and political activists.

It is important, too, to balance male and female commentators as well as representatives of a variety of racial, ethnic, and religious opinion, if possible. Like the clergyperson attuned to the seasons of the church year, editorial page editors must be alert to days, weeks and months that celebrate the contributors to our diverse and pluralistic society.

Even in cartoon selection, an editor seeks balance. Cartoonists often are the boldest, harshest and most outrageous opinion-makers, and because of that they often demand an editor's strictest attention and greatest risk of judgment.

Editors of editorial content strive to balance the highly literate with the pedestrian and seek to provide material of interest to both genders of readers as well as a wide range of ages. We'd probably be surprised at the number of school children, for example, who devour op-ed pieces about Christopher Columbus and the discovery of America.

Social issues, justice issues and issues raised by the popular culture -- along with the typical legislative and policy issues of government -- must be given expression. A good recent example covering this range would be the moral discussion surrounding J. K. Rowling's books narrating the adventures of Harry Potter, a young wizard.

Finally -- and here's my little secret -- the editor must make this potpourri of opinion and commentary fit on a single page of the newspaper.

In doing this, an editorial page editor, I'm discovering, yearns for the 300- to 500-word commentary. My experience tells me the average editorial, commentary or opinion-essay runs between 800 and 1000 words.

Often, a 400-word hole remains as an editor nears completion of the page design.

To be sure, there are typographic "tricks" one applies to fill this space: display quotations or pullouts, tried-and-true magazine techniques. However, most editors' first instinct is to seek a brief commentary that will go into the hole snugly without much trimming and trickery.

The writer who limits his or her comments to 500 words has a real chance of becoming an editorial page editor's dream.

For your reference, this commentary on how to become a desirable columnist is 530 words long.

I told you I had trouble learning this lesson.

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Allan R. Andrews can be contacted at allan.andrews@reporters.net